2 AM

Do you ever get those calls at 2 AM where your best friend is drunk and made some good decisions and some bad decision that night, but can't figure out which is which?
I did.

I decided to go to bed around 2 AM after looking at apartments and thinking about how and when and with whom I could rent one. I was being slightly pessimistic about my financial situation and my man (men?) situation and having a hard time getting to sleep. Then my phone vibrated next to my bed.

It was my friend. She sounded upset and was clearly drunk and walking somewhere outside. I could hardly understand her, but finally by the time she got back to her apartment, I got the story right. Apparently she met this guy at a party and they had a deep discussion for awhile before he asked (asked!) if he could kiss her. She said yes and they made out. Then they talked some more. At some point his friend came over and talked to him and she went to talk to her friend. Her friend was with this guy who offered to help her figure it out on the porch outside. Long story short, he led her to his apartment and she decided not to go in so as not to be tempted by sex. That's when she called me.

We talked about her situation and thoughts on sex and my own. For example, she likes making out with guys as well as talking to them. I just can't hook up with a guy like that. It's not that one is good and one is bad. We're just different people and have different preferences.

If you look at my records I have always had at least 2 guys circling me at any given time...sometimes 3 or 4. This isn't to say I act on anything with all 2, 3 or 4, but they show interest and I figure out which one I'm most interested in (if any).

Well there have only been a couple who have really stood out - 3 to be exact. Funny how they all relate back to high school and how they're all kind of like trump cards (if they're around, they are of more importance than newer guys).
1. Luke, but I've spent so much blog space on him that I think you get the picture if you read this regularly
2. Slightly older, Indie musician who looks a little nerdy. Such a hot combination in my opinion. He's sweet, a little oblivious, wise, mature, likes nature and Maine, likes children and who I feel comfortable with and can talk to.
3. A year older, well off Jewish man who is gorgeous, nice, mature, environmentally aware, good older brother, caring, friendly, easy to talk to, smart.

So they trump everyone else (sorry guys). This isn't to say that there isn't anyone in existence who I might like better. I just haven't met him yet. Then I started wondering if they all came back into my life what the hell would I do?
Answer: No fucking clue.
However, if that were to happen then Luke would have to step up. He'd have to consider some sort of commitment if he was serious about me, because the other 2 would in that situation.

Anyway it's just a theoretical scenario.

I did tell my friend about Wednesday night though and last Friday. I told her that Luke said he would come to my party and she was really excited about that. This is kind of a big deal because she doesn't like him normally.

I also came to the conclusion that I accidentally made a friend's girlfriend feel threatened....well I didn't make it happen. She just read the wall post the wrong way and I probably could have phrased it better if I had thought about it at the time.

It's all so complicated. My friend was complaining about that on the phone. It's true. This isn't disney. There aren't any Prince Charmings. This is life. It's a mess. We just have to figure it out for ourselves and rely on our friends when we feel lost or worn out...just like my friend and me tonight at 2:30 AM on the phone.