Never Say Never

Yes I'm listening to that song again.

But more importantly I've been talking with my brother. He always asks the same question even if it's only been 3 days since I last talked to him. "So have you made it official yet?" Lots of people ask me that actually. Answer is no. For some reason I feel slightly ashamed even though it's not my fault...I know it's not...I think...

He and I got into our usual argument over this. Along the same lines as Carol's arguments. It's good though. It makes me think. It doesn't make me change my mind though. If anything the arguments makes me see I'm doing the right thing even more clearly. They say, "be careful." I say, "too late." The best part? I can say it with complete acceptance. It's a fact that I've come to accept.

Tonight I took Luca for a walk in the woods. Originally I was just going to take him to the bathroom and return, but something had scared me and I felt the need to take a walk. It was so light out. The full moon lit the path in the woods. The snow was a soft lavender color. I felt like I was in another world. So peaceful. I cried some. Then I started talking to Luca/myself. I told him my questions and worries. I told him a secret. I told him what I wanted. Somehow I started laughing along the way. It made me feel a lot better. It also allowed me to clearly articulate myself in the discussion with Beans.

I guess you could say I'm determined and loyal. I don't think one can go without the other. So yes, I'll stand up to everyone when it comes to Luke.

On another note, tomorrow is the big game. USA vs. Canada. I'm excited and nervous. Are we the best or the second best hockey team in the world? Is Ryan Miller the best goalie in the world? I think so, but I guess we'll see tomorrow. They're playing the first part of the game at the civic center before the Pirates game. I'll either go to that with Luke or I'll stay home and watch it there. I'm most proud of the shirt I made. It says Team USA on the front and #39 Ryan Miller on the back in red, white and blue. I'll be wearing it tomorrow and maybe Monday if all goes well!

Tomorrow's the full moon. I'm ready.

Current Playlist:
I'm Gonna Getcha Good - Shania Twain
Glass Danse - The Faint
Cry Tonight Kim Sozzi
If I Had You - Adam Lambert