Don't Stress

I went to bed last night not knowing if I was so exhausted from my week or if it was emotional exhaustion. I had hoped it was from my week. I'm still leaning in that direction. I've been unusually calm about this who new 'I'm going to tell Luke and straighten this out' thing. I feel somewhat relaxed about it....but also I feel anxious. The weight has been lifted off my own shoulders and put on his. I'm sorry to have to add more for him to think about, but I can't go through this summer like last. Things have changed since then, and I think he needs to acknowledge that.

So I woke up at 4:45 AM. I'd been tossing and turning all night. I was too hot under my covers, but I don't like to sleep without even when it's really hot. My dream was basically about saving this secret village from some sort of gang who wanted to take over the mountain on which they lived and mine there. Then there was this specific guy from the village...Anyway when I finally woke up, I realized it was mostly about the stress. It was the same exactly feeling that I have while I'm waiting for him to think it over.

At least I finally did it. Pretty fuckin proud of myself.

Also proud of my new bathing suit and how great it looks on me! Couldn't have worn it last year. Alas I won't be anywhere warm to wear it properly, but I'm sure I'll get good use out of it this summer.

It's now 5:35 and I'm going back to bed...